Balance is the name of the game for me. It’s ok to accept that some days are going to be shit. But when every day is shit, that’s when you have a real problem. After I dug myself out of my hole a few years ago, I swore that I wouldn’t let difficult days/things/situations get me down too much. But how can you do that? For me, I have to choose optimism and positivity. I need to balance out the dark stuff with some light. So last week’s post was a little on the down side, regarding the challenges of being a stay at home dad. This week, I want to lean the other way.
Being a parent is the best. It just is. You cannot convince me anything else is better in this world. Being a parent is all there is (maybe being a grandparent, that seems cool too). My collection of world experiences is pretty robust. I had fun in college. I backpacked Australia and New Zealand for a year and a half after graduation. I’ve lived in lots of very fun cities, and traveled all over the world. All of that is great. But there is nothing that compares to the feeling of pure love for these little creations of ours. Even when he is being a turd. One of the funny things about being a special needs parent is that the little rebellions and the bad behavior (he’s almost 6) don’t bother me at all. I think it’s awesome. If you would have seen the start to life that this kid had, it’s a literal miracle that he can tell me to go away because he doesn’t like me and blow raspberries at me.
We all have these parental moments that keep us going and fill our cup. Autism, Down Syndrome, rare disease, Spini Bifida, cerebral palsy, whatever we’re facing. It is HARD. It is the hardest thing we’ll ever do. People have no idea. But it’s also the best thing we’ll ever do. Here are a few things that this process has done for me, I’d love to hear what it’s done for you as well.
-I’m a better son and brother now and make more of an effort to connect with family
-Seeing my parents become grandparents and the light that their grandson gives them is one of life’s special things. My dad wrote a poem and engraved it on a plaque for him and I cried when I read it lol. How cool is that?
-I give zero fucks about what people think. Pretty much nothing bothers me anymore, because my focus is so concentrated
-I have more confidence in all other areas. When you go through something incredibly difficult, it builds a steel inside you. “If this didn’t break me, how bad can this other thing be?”